Fucking hell! What is with these people?

Hot on the heels of Facebook’s “like” button, our nearly elected ad hoc Government have launched ePetitions on Direct.gov.uk.

The idea behind it seems to be giving a voice to people who have loud, often backward and ill-informed opinions.

I believe there is a time and place for that sort of thing, like left-wing blogs or Essex pubs.  There really is no need for the Government to stir this nest of angry pigs.

While there may be nothing wrong with suggesting ideas for improving the country, the fatal flaw of the ePetitions minisite is that it will only attract a certain sort of person.

Judging by the bulk of responses so far, British people have an obsession with getting even on criminals, even in cases of extreme irony.

Of the mad ideas being suggested by these Daily Mail sorts, many seem to involve killing people.

These include (verbatim):


“bring back hanging”

“the restoration of hanging”

“debate the restoration of hanging”

“capital punishment”

“Referendum Needed On The Return of Capital Punishment”


“Restoration Of Capital Punishment For Serial Killers”

and “Campaign for real sentencing” – No prizes for guessing what that means.

Sounds like Mr Cul-de-Sac gone mad and so too have the British public.

Food for thought: America has more serial killers than anywhere else and also uses the death penalty.

Conversely, if not perversely, the list of ‘rejected’ ideas heavily focuses on trying to destroy the BBC.

In fact, the vast majority of the suggestions have distinctly Tory overtones and concern typical Conservative gripes.

One of the stranger suggestions is “Change to the way blood and organ donations work”.  This would surely require expensive and time consuming medical research, well beyond the remit of Parliament.  Having said that, if there was a way of transplanting organs by osmosis, I’d sign the ePetition that makes it so.

Perhaps one of the weirdest of all is “Treason”.  I’m not sure whether it’s for or against or if it relates to anything else, but I believe this is the work of someone not quite right.

But the question this all boils down to is: Is this democracy? Really? Allowing any old idiot hell bent on revenge to put forward their ideas.  Yes, it’s fair to let everyone have their say, but who is it meant to benefit?

These ideas are nothing new and no doubt people have been asking local MPs about this sort of thing for years. Up until now however, it’s always been largely ignored, save for Richard Littlejohn’s column.

If this ePetitions thing does have legs though, expect to see “Burn the paedophiles” and “Dig up Myra Hindley” sometime soon.

Fortunately, the number of signatures for each suggestion is currently low. However, it’s still early days and it may only be a matter of time until we see “IF I GET 1,000,000 SIGNATURES MY MUM SAID WE CAN LYNCH A PAEDOPHILE LOL!” debated in the House of Commons.  I dread that day.